The Transfer Experience

This past fall, I transferred to a new school.  My situation was a bit atypical in that I loved my old university.  However, I felt the Lord calling me to a new place.  I felt that my time there was coming to an end.  I struggled with the choice and wavered on my decision until literally the last minute; the night before the deadline to accept my spot at Westmont College. 

This transition was one that I was not fully prepared for and the Lord has challenged me, stretched me, and strengthened me through this experience.  I am a planner, and I am accustomed to being fully prepared for everything.  Additionally, transitions have never been an issue for me; I moved from elementary school to junior high without a problem, from junior high to high school without a problem, and from high school to college without a problem.  Therefore, when my transition to a new college was not as smooth and easy as I expected, I was caught off guard and struggled with the Lord’s purpose in His plan.  God has used this year to prepare my heart, mind, and soul for this new place which I can finally call home and can finally say that I am starting love. 

The first stage in this process of prepartion was a period of questioning.  I wondered why God had brought me here.  I felt as though I had given up so much and that I was not reaping enough benefits or serving a great enough purpose to make up for what I had sacrificed.  I sometimes wished I had never transferred but never considered going back.  I assumed the Lord had me here for a reason, and I prayed that He would reveal it to me sooner rather than later.  He didn’t.  To be honest, I didn’t think He would.  I think I knew in my heart that I would need to be patient and that I would only know and realize the purpose of His plan much further down the road. 

The next stage in the process was a period of hope.  It was not a hopefulness about being at Westmont, but rather, a hopefulness about leaving and going back to my old school.  During the fall semester, I did not think that it would be possible to go back to TCU nor did I think the Lord wanted me to do so.  However, at the beginning of the spring semester, signs were seemingly pointing me in the direction of return.  This season ended with a clear sign that I was not being called to go back.  I was so grateful for the clarity because it was a lack of clarity that had made me question my original move. 

The third stage in this preparation was a period of acceptance and changed hope.  Once I had confirmation that this IS where I am supposed to be, I was able to begin the acceptance process and really start to invest again.  I am realizing that yes, Westmont is much different than TCU, but different is not necessarily bad, unless I make it out to be.  The Lord has really been at work in my heart and has truly worked a miracle within the past couple of months.  I have had a countdown in my planner until my departure for the summer since about day 60.  Now, as that number is dwindling down to 17, I am actually starting to feel sad.  I can only explain this 180 degree turn around as a work of the Lord.  God is good.  He is faithful.  I am particularly in awe of his faithfulness because in this situation, I have not been as faithful in prayer or seeking Him through the word as I should have been, yet he still provided.  My hope has now taken a new form; it is now a hope for my future here at Westmont. 

The Lord has taken this year to prepare me for the permanence of my transition.  Each of the stages was necessary in this process because if I hadn’t questioned, if I hadn’t thought I would be leaving, and if I hadn’t received confirmation that I was not supposed to leave, I would not be at the place I am right now; a place of peace and contentment, of joy and thankfulness. 

I am reminded of one of my favorite verses: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” -Jeremiah 29:11